Stolen Valor- Not even slick about it edition

UPDATE: I hate these guys. TSO at This Ain’t Hell eviscerates these guys. Seriously, if you are some loser thinking about claiming honors that aren’t yours? Don’t. TSO will hunt you down like Obama going after your wallet.

The ever wise and wonderful CDR Salamander brings us this dickhead.  Most of the pitiful creatures that claim honors they didn’t earn at least TRY to stay within the bounds of plausibility. How anyone at the victory party for new Houston mayor Annise Parker could believe this… thing… might be an Army officer, much less a general officer, is beyond me.

This person is committing a Federal offense. Under the Stolen Valor act he can be, and should be prosecuted. If you know who he is, contact CDR Salamander at the link above. Let’s help nail this turd, and save the respect so many of our people have for those that earned it.

68 thoughts on “Stolen Valor- Not even slick about it edition”

  1. Um, Jewstin, probably because anybody that highly decorated would be well known to people like xbradtc and CDR Salamander.

  2. Jewstin

    1. He has a CIB with two stars
    2. He is wearing another badge above the CIB

    Anyone/everyone in the US ARMY knows that nothing goes above the CIB



  3. Umm. It’s fake because a real military officer would not wear the wrong medals and insignias together like this. And, the mess dress jacket would be perfectly tailored on a torso that would look much more dangerous than this clown, who looks like he borrowed the uniform from the costume rack at his junior college. I don’t believe that a US military officer can even accept knighthood in the British Empire or wear the medal if they could.

  4. Are you sure this wasn’t some sort of Halloween costume? Obviously shopped at Wannebe’s R Us.

  5. I’m going to give benefit of the doubt and HOPE this weenie is just playing dress up and isn’t seriously trying to pass.

  6. Obviously the leading proponent for the military’s new “Don’t Tell, I Already Know” policy.

  7. What about the CIA patch on his jacket? This guy’s apparently a military hero and James Bond rolled all into one.

  8. his facial hair & haircut are also a dead give away.

    besides that – he looks to be about 32yrs old (rounded up) & unable to grow a real beard or mustache.

  9. Im sure his men followed him out of sheer curiosity. So who is going to Nuke this dud. As an NCO overseas for the better part of the last 6 years it looks to me like Rome is on fire, the Emperor is looking for his violin and this guy is leading the Preatorian Guard. Good luck fellow Americans. I am retiring in France so I can surrender in style. We will hold off the Nazis and the Jihadis. Its up to you to hold of the politicians.

  10. So obviously fake, I can’t see why its worth getting worked up about.

    Looks like the guy is headed out to a costume party, not to testify as a “Winter Soldier”.

  11. How do we know this is a fake? When was the last time you saw a military man like he claims he is, in a mess dress uniform, with sideburns and a “soul patch”? I can count the times on one hand, and that is only because it takes all five fingers to form a zero.

    Furthermore, the CBE is limited to less than 9000 people worldwide. Does this douchebag look like he would be in that number? He looks like he should be at a Pearl Jam concert, not receiving awards from the Queen. However, he would be allowed to accept such an award, as evidenced by the awarding of an Honorary KBE to Admiral Leighton Smith.

    Honestly, when was the last time you saw a BG as young as he is? You would have read about it in every military publication there is in the United States. It is as if this guy went out of his way to get caught.

  12. “So obviously fake, I can’t see why its worth getting worked up about.”

    Why get all worked up? Because this douchebag is wearing medals that required individuals to risk their lives, and some died in the process, to earn. That is why.
    Those medals have to be earned, and he didn’t earn them.

  13. A wannabe coward douche pretending to be a military tough guy? Sounds like every republican in Washington.

  14. Chairman Mow ALMOST correctly says: “Anyone/everyone in the US ARMY knows that nothing goes above the CIB ergo

    With ONE exception – the “big bong” i.e. the Congressional Medal of Honor (CMO). THAT is displayed top right – above all others.

    I’m sure Chairman Mow will correctly point out even this mope doesn’t have the balls to claim the CMO – although he seems to have ‘won’ everything else

    1. The CIB goes above the ribbons, even if the MOH is worn. Of course, in mess dress, the MOH would be worn around the neck. As to the CBE, or other foreign awards, you have to have permission from Congress to wear them.

  15. Wait a minute…

    You people are flipping out because some guy at the Anise Parker party was wearing an obviously ridiculous costume trying to make himself look special? LMFAO!

    A guy trying to play General? Or.. a fruitcake’s silly party costume?

    Hmmm… Anise Parker party.. i’m gonna guess this is just a simple fruitcake that knew what he wanted to wear to their victory party. ; )

    Save the reward money and just use Occam’s razor!

    1. I guess we’ll just let people break the law willy nilly, trax. And I note Ms. Parker’s party, not as a political or partisan thing, but that it was a high profile event and it is surprising that no one called him out on such a level of fakery.

  16. Well, trax, it looks like some people did track down his info, and the douche is claiming that he “retired” as a Ltc. Colonel, after having served as Powell’s personal bodyguard for a while. So he claims he really served in the Army. What do you say now?

  17. trax – if you ever read what recipiants of those honors actually have to go through to be awarded those honors, then yes – it really is a big thing. So big a thing that it is a federal offense to wear those awards without being awarded them.

  18. First, I did NOT know he was claiming that… so bag over my head.

    Second, I do respect the efforts to carve these people out and set them on fire.

    Third, I’m well aware of the sacrifice and honor those awards represent.

    Though I still think this is just some insecure fruitcake… after hearing that he actually laid claim to service.. i’d like to help.

    Can I be pointed to more information about what he said/claimed?

  19. And I was just pointing out that it’s not uncommon to see “costumes” at gay parties.

    You’re surprised that there were no regular joes at Anise Parker’s victory party? Really?

    FYI… Anise Parker is the new darling for the out/open gay movement.

    It may be knee-slappin funny that nobody realized how ridiculous this guy was… but I’m not surprised at all. I find it funny!

  20. Coffee shops are crawling with these douchebags. They wear girl glasses, closely shorn hair and speak in a feminine manner with an almost lisp.

    A messenger bag/purse is usually part of their attire with a single speed bicycle not far away.

    It’s creepy as hell.

  21. There was a similar law to the Stolen Valor Act back when I was in the service (way back in the early 80’s) it was struck down as unconstitutional so I don’t hold out much hope of this guy going to jail.

  22. Jenn, SVA has been quite successfully used to prosecute several people. There has been no constitutional challenge to it yet that I’m aware of.

  23. You’re right about the prosecutions. I should have checked before I wrote that. I do expect an appeal of SVA at some point. As I recall (and this was 20+ years ago) there was some idiot who was going on TV claiming to be a Vietnam vet and talking about how horrible he had it and how the VA should give him benefits. At one point he wore a field jacket or one of the old style fatigue shirts with his “medals” and someone charged him. It was thrown out as protected political speech and the law went away. I remember quite the write up in the navy Times and Stars and Stripes.

  24. I remember reading that article (at the Army/Navy surplus store on 1st Street in Seattle). But that dealt mostly with wearing articles of the uniform, not the entire uniform, which is misrepresentation, and in case of someone attempting to either gain benefits, or otherwise gain some benefit from their misrepresentation, fraud. I think it will withstand most appeal attempts.

  25. Maybe it’s been too long, but my memory says the Pathfinder Badge goes to the heart side of your Jump Wings.

  26. the FBI now has the identity and other information on this individual and could move forward with prosecution. however, after 10 years, the FBI usually finds that the problem in getting any action taken lays within the local U.S. Attorney offices who do not feel it is worth their time and effort, no glory, etc., or simply apathy towards the military.
    as videos of him at the mayor’s event exist, there is no question about guilty. one of the better ways to bring pressure to bear is to get the local media, TV, press, to write up the story and demand that he be prosecuted. Will it happen? let’s hope so.. but being he was at the Mayor’s party, who can say

  27. Well, CDR Salamander was in touch with the local ABC affiliate in Houston, so maybe they’ll pick it up and ask some uncomfortable questions.

  28. this guy worked for Council Member Lovell back in 2008.. I think July to October.. He is scum.. And the Good ole Houston City Council Member Didnt ask to see his DD214 when he claimed and asaked for Veteran Preference..

  29. CJ, Michell, thanks for the updates. Glad to hear he got busted.

    I was actually a little surprised when my last job (non-government) asked for a look at my DD214. None of my other employers asked for it.

  30. He’s gonna hate Federal pound-me-in-the-ass prison (apologies to “Office Space”). Douchebag.

  31. He should be put to the cane. I think maybe 60 lashes might convince him and others like him not to impersonate true warriors.

    And, no, I’m not kidding about the punishment. When the ACLU comes to defend him on the issues of free speech, those in opposition should start chanting the the defendant’s lawyer is known for exposing himself to little boys.

    Yeah, free speech.

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