The tobacco lasted for eight days, against all odds. “I still can’t believe it,” platoon mooch Pfc. John Peters said. “That can never ran out. I must’ve bummed a dozen pinches from that chump and I didn’t put a dent in it. Hey, can I grab a Marlboro while we’re talking?”
Platoon mooch- ha! Every platoon has at least one.
During my one and only trip to the National Training Center, I swung by the PX before we entered the box to stock up on smokes. Lo and behold, they had some cheap no-name brand of cigarettes on sale at $2 a carton!* There was a five carton limit, but I was there with my mom and my dad, who happened to be in the area and stopped by for a visit. And they both had valid IDs. So I walked out with 15 cartons of cheap smokes.
How bad is the platoon mooch? Well, we actually only spent 14 days in the box. And I ran out of smokes.
*Cheap smokes and no state sales taxes!